I am suffocating and i just need to breathe I'm smothered under pressure I must be relieved.
Nothing I do is right, Nothing they say is fair I cry in pain But no one seems to care
Nobody will listen, To what i have to say
I can't do what i want, I cannot stay out late Here I sit and write this poem To release my pain and hate
I'm confused and i'm alone I'm lost inside my mind No one will search beyond my looks To see what they might find
None of it makes sense None of this seems real And none understands The emotions that i feel.
Woken up at
7:33 PM
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
I am SICK...
How great!!! I'm so so in pain... help me!!! every part hurts... haish...
tmr onwards, scrips will be given... i'm doomed...
FiR...
Woken up at
8:40 PM
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Well, yesterday i had so much fun cycling with Bro... haha... nth do.. so he ask me go cycling... from his place we went down to my place.. hoho... then i brought him to the jetty near my place... yeah... then after we went somewhr we didn't noe... lols credits to him.. hahha... jk... well had fun aniwaes... we finally cycled back to his place... wah.. it was very tiring man... huhu... fasting somemore.. we jus grab smth to break fast then talk for awhile and i cycled home...
DON'T UNDER ESTIMATE ME!!! IM NOT THAT BLIND TILL CAN'T SEE ANYTHING TO CYCLE... I noe it's not u who is reading tis... but i jus noe that someone does...
Today...
i did not do anything much... the break fast, i wanna thank my whole my whole family for their kind words!!!! thx alot!!!! really!!!! spoil my mood!!!! Such lame person i hav in my family!!! SOMETIMES I JUST DON'T FEEL LIKE I HAVE A FAMILY...!!!
I'M NOTHING TO THIS WORLD!!!
YAY... I SUCK....
TREAT ME LIKE SHIT STILL GOT HEART TO ASK GO OUT WITH YOU PEOPLE? YOU PEOPLE REALLY THING I DON'T HAVE FEELINGS... THANK GOD YOU GUYS GO OUT... ATLEAST I DON'T HAVE TO LOOK AT SOME LAME FACES... SO SACARSTIC...
SO PISSED CAN!
I'm off...
FiR...
Woken up at
9:03 PM
1. The first person who tagged you is: Junyang
2. Your relationship with him/her is: Very good... .
3. Your Five impression of him/her: crazy, hyper, blur, clever and cute?
4. The most memorable thing he/she had done for you: The one who tries to make me smile
5. The most memorable thing he/she said to you: Cheer up (ok.. im not sure... i hav STML tis days... I noe tyhat's no the most memorable..)
6. If he/she become your lover, you will: Take care and never to hurt.
7. If he/she become your lover, thing he/she will have to improve on will be: Dunnoe?
8. If he/she become your enemy, you will: Will not happen...
9. If he/she become your enemy, the reason will be: I'm not in the wrong, not my fault... hahaha jk...
10. The most desired thing you want to do for him/her now is: Cheer him up when ever his down...
11. Your overall impression of him/her is: Bestie
12. How you think people around will feel about you: crazy lonely emo?
13. The characters you love of yourself are: Being friendly
14. On the contrary, the characteristics you hate most about yourself are: being emo.
15. The most ideal person you want to be is: less being hurt...
16. For that people who care and like you, say something to them: I love you guys alot...
17. Pass this quiz to 10 people that you wish to know how they feel about you, pass to people who have blog only: 1.Haikal 2.Diyana 3.Dickson 4.Jingyi 5.Shahirah 6.♥ secret 7.Dzakiyyah 8.Faiezah 9.Hazzry, 10.Fazianti
18. who is no. 6 having relationship with? (♥ secret) Likes someone? haha
19. is no.9 female or male? ( Hazzry ) male
20. if no. 7 and 10 are together, will it be a good thing? ( Dzakiyyah and Fazianti ) eerrr lesbians? lol tat wud be bad...
21. what is no.2 studying about? ( Diyana ) She's studying about Love.. lol jk.. her O's.. DUH....
22. when was the last time you had a chat with no. 3? ( Dickson ) Yesterday? yeah...
23. what kind of music band does no.8 like? ( Faiezah ) hmmm alot? bt surely include concert band songs...
24. does no.1 have any siblings? ( Haikal ) No. Only child...
25. will you woo no.3? ( Dickson ) Yesyes... lol jk le... lol....
26. how about no.7? ( Dzakiyyah ) lol...
27. is no.4 single? ( Jingyi ) No. but got part-time... lol...
28. what is the surname of no.5? ( Shahirah ) Dunnoe?
Woken up at
6:42 PM
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Okay, this was posted but as draft... as u noe i am busy for O's... atleast im posting.. haha.. ahhemm somebody still owe me a post...
This is dedicated to my lovely Bro, Haikal...
Happy Birthday Haikal!!!
Happy Birtgday To You, Happy Birtgday To You, Happy Birtgday To Haikal! Happy Birtgday To You!
Yay... Haikal's 16... old liaos... act like one hor... if nt i smack ur face.. lol...
Well, i hope all ur wishes come true.... i wish all the best through out your years.. hope you will not face many difficulties in life... If there's anything, you know where to find me... Don't be so emo liaos... okay? u always have me wherever you are... i'm always thr by your side... even if i leave the sch at the end of year, i wud not forget u at all... i wud always try to make a time for u if u need it.. no probs... so dun worry kay bro... I wish You all the best for Your Final Year Exams... I hope you treasure our happy and bad moments together... even if it's bad, we know that it taught us a lesson... I'm gonna miss ya so much when i leave... sooo... ya..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY AGAIN... BE HAPPY ALWAYS AND SMILE ALWAYS... don't keep that sweet smile... lols...
Hope you have/had a great time on your birthday...
so on Haikal's birthday and before, Dickson and me accompanied him all the way to make him happy... haha... Well i guess he really enjoyed our company... On his birthday, although it was my prelims and ended early, i actually rushed home and change and came back to school to pick him up.. haha.. hw sweet is that.. lol.. kay then we went to meet dickson... and went to the bday boy's home to wait for him to change... we actually have no idea on what to do to celebrate as it's fasting month so both dickson and me decided to bring him play bball or cycling... end up we did both... lol... sad part is when bday boy's bike tyer went flat as he pump to much air in it... see la nvr listen to me... haha... he had to take out 8bucks to change the tube... wth.. sad... then we go to bball court and play bball... DUH.. but we play cycling thr also... hehe.. so then we lazy to play bball cos no air... so bday boy go and keep his bball and we continued cycling for awhile b4 dickson had to go... we went up to bdayboy's hse shortly after to return his and his cousin's bike then sent dickson home... after sending that boy, me and bday boy had break fast together at admiralty... then we ended the day... hope he enjoyed the day.. hahah... btw i bought him smth wif the help of some ppl who shared money... Ahah... jus some wallet and lanyard...(dunnoe hw to spell) Looking at it, i wish i hav one.. hahaha...
lol.. so yeah i think im done...
take cares...
FiR...
Woken up at
9:25 PM
Saturday, September 6, 2008
I'm nothing to you, nothing at all i guess... i guess im jus some shit that you flush... so nice of the language you use to communicate with me... Ami i suppose to be happy or sad? It's Gone... ouh thx alot... you just suck at that... useless...
aaarrrgghhh im so stress... prelims resume nxt week!!! and living in such a live, i feel more pressured... it's just hard to get help, sometimes, some people just don't get what you mean they start saying thing that are irrelevant. then if i say not that, they will get irritated... not only one person, some people...
So, it's not i don't want help, it's jus that at the end of the day, the person would be angry or irritated or i just ruins people's day.. just because of my idiotic life...
haish... sry to whom i made your day worst...
i guess i rather suffer alone...
FiR...
Woken up at
3:12 PM
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
Sadness! Oh sadness! Why do you ever come to me? Now I feel alone, I feel lost and I feel empty!
I had it all when I was with you, Now that you're gone I've completely lost everything.
You say I no longer care, But you're the one who gave up.
You say I no longer have to be with you, But you're the one who has moved on.
You say I no longer need you, Damn, I thought you knew me better than that.
I dont understand. I gave u everything i had. I was there for u when my life was crashing down, i gave my best to make u happy. Why is that not good enough in ur eyes? Im sorry baby tht im not wat u wanted all along
My heart has been broken not just once or twice, but a million times. Why waste my time picking up the pieces when it is just going to happen again...
You may not see my scars, or feel my depression. You may say it's not real. But sometimes you can't see the pain someone feels.
The worst part about moving on, Is knowing you can no longer live in the past.
Sometimes when you really love someone, You can never erase the feeling. All you can do ismove the feeling to the back of your mind, And pretend it isn't killing you.
Sometimes the only choice you have, Is the one you know is going to hurt in the end.
When the shadows beam, Misery remains and I won't leave this time
p.s : jus feeling dwn...
FiR...
Woken up at
9:08 PM
Monday, September 1, 2008
Special announcement...
In tis holy month, The PG has step down for the moment... sorry for inconvenient caused... Who wanna be Temp PG?
hahaha... lols.. ok i noe.... LAME!!!
Tis is bcos....... IM BORED...
FiR...
Woken up at
3:37 PM
Disclaimer
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This is FiRdAuS Blog
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The Fallen One
#Name:MuHd FiRdAuS BiN SaRiFi
#Known As: FiRdAuS / FiR / DaUs / AbAnGcIk(by me cousin)
#Age: 18(in august)
#Birthday: 29 AuGuSt (BuY Me A PrEsEnT Ok?)
#Status: SiNgLe
#Schools: SSVH, AhMaD IbRaHiM SeCoNdArY ScHoOl... Bw in ?????
#Band: AhMaD IbRaHiM CoNcErT BaNd... (Alumni liaos)
#Occupation: StUdEnT, MuSiCiAn, PiAnIsT, TuBiSt, EuPhOnIsT AnD WaNtInG To Be TrUmPeTeR
My WiShEs
# WISHES To be with her one day
# WISHES To Have A New Phone
# WISHES To Have A New Jacket
# WISHES To Have More Shirts
# WISHES To Have More Jeans
# WISHES To Have More Frens
# WISHES To BE LOVED <3...
# WISHES To Be Happy Everyday.
# WISHES AlL My WiShEs CoMe ThRoUgH... :D.<
